That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
