stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
