The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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