So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
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