Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
cat food counts as protein by the way
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Randomize
