You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Randomize
