I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
