420 ftw
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
