This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
