Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
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