you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize