Do vagina's smell?
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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