Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
