Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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