we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize