I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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