therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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