you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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