Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
