If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
that may or may not have been my penis.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize