on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
