Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
How does one acquire holy water?
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
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