Pappa wants mamma naked
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I could fuck to npr.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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