It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize