hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
farters have to be the big spoon...
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Randomize
