I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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