Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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