I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Randomize
