sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
