Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
