I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
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