Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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