Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
