I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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