he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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