Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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