You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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