is this the sara with the beer cane?
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
