No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize