Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
