garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
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