i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
