The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize