you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Just puked most of my soul out..
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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