Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Randomize
