Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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