Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Randomize
