weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Betty ford says i'm here all night
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
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