i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
