Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
