did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
