I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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